In loving memory...

Ever had one of those nights that started normal then got weird then sad.

First I'm just surfing the net procrastinating from making a banner then I just had this random flashback of me sleeping on the roof and nearly falling off when I woke up. I was thinking about that for awhile then suddenly I started thinking of Hailu and I couldnt stop.

I totally lost it, I had to go in another cuz I didn't wanna wake my mom. Called my Keesha and she helped talk me down.

I have a great bf, he just knows what to say and esp what not to say.

Now I'm thinking of my brother, I had a brother. The first pic I ever saw of him was his funeral program. The only time I really saw him he was in a coffin. He's the reason I never looked at Hailu in his coffin. I never watched him being buried. I don't to ever want to remember him like that.

All my memories of Hailu are of him alive and I like it that way. He loved red, swimming, playing kalookie and doing that thing with his finger when it was his turn to draw. He was a great graphics artist, great listener. You could have intelligent, deep and silly concersations with him, cry on his shoulder. My fave thing is when he scolds ppl. He never comes off as judgemental or harsh but caring.

I feel better now, this blog thingy wasn't such a bad idea after all.